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An "Old" Farmer, a "City" Lawyer, and a "Dead" Duck A big-city, Californian lawyer went duck hunting in RURAL TEXAS. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor, and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it." The old farmer replied, "This is MY! property, and you are NOT! coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am 1 of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you doN'T let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you doN'T know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with THE TEXAS-3-KICK RULE." The lawyer asked, "What is the TEXAS-3- KICK RULE?" The Farmer replied, "Well, 1st I kick you 3 times, and then you kick me 3 times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the pro- posed contest and decided that he could easily take on the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His 1st kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees.His 2nd kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's 3rd kick to a kidney nearly caused him to expire. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "OK, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!"   The old farmer GRINNED and said, "NAW, I GIVE UP. YOU CAN HAVE THE DUCK!"

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